User blog:Amontgomery1432/Deadpool 2 - Amont's Movie Reviews
Greetings hi hello I'm not dead! I am Amont and I'm here to review a movie. Today, I watched Deadpool 2. And it's about fuckin' time, too! Oh, Christ. Not this guy again. Yeah, you're finally getting to my movie. But, wait, what's that date say over there? "May 18th"? That means you've had two fucking months, Monty! Two! What the fuck took you so long, asshole? I thought what we had was special! Well, you see, there is this thing known as money that I do not always posses. Thankfully, according to IMDb, your movie is still in theaters. So zip it, Weapon X. Be thankful I saw it in the first place! Well, did you enjoy it? Yeah, it was good. But I'm not gonna leave it at just that, that's what this blog is- Nah nah nah, piss off. You know it's the best movie ever made. So why don't you just go and work on those guest verses that you haven't touched in months, and let me handle this? Okay, it isn't your show. It's your movie, but it's not your show. It'd be biased as hell if you reviewed your own movie. Hold up, didn't Nostalgia Critic do this setup for his review of my movie? Look, it doesn't fuckin' matter. We're wasting too much time. I'm gonna review your movie, you go fuck a horse or whatever it is you do in your spare time. I'm not saying shit until my lawyer is here. This is my review of Deadpool 2! Let's get this outta the way from the getgo: This movie is hilarious. The opening credits being a spot-on James Bond parody, an action sequence being set to fucking Dolly Parton, enough fourth-wall breaks to tear down an entire apartment complex. Was that supposed to be funny? Cause it wasn't. Wade is his usual witty self, due to Ryan Reynolds once again giving it his all. I swear, he was born to play this role. And the other actors are good, too, especially Dopinder. He was easily one of the best things about this movie. Yeah, he's a good kid. Absolute goddamn psychopath, but a good kid. Josh Brolin's Cable was great. I think he worked perfectly with Wade. Also, Yukio is adorable. I'll fuckin' gouge out your eyes if you go anywhere near her. The soundtrack was nice as well. Celine Dion's "Ashes" is an awesome song, the aforementioned "9 to 5" scene was funny, and the use of "Take On Me" near the end was both funny and kinda touching at the same time. Did you just say "aforementioned"? Did you just steal a joke from Infinity War? Cause it wouldn't be the first time. Ouch. Which reminds me: This movie is not just a comedy. It has heart. There are a lot of sweet, tender, and downright depressing scenes in this movie. I love Wade and Vanessa's relationship, Yukio and Negasonic are a nice couple, Wade and Domino's mutual respect was sweet. Not as sweet as Colossus's ass was. Whoa nelly! And the action scenes are great, too! Brutality at its finest. Kickass choreography, gunfights, people getting ripped in half, thrown around. It's fucking glorious! Juggernaut gets a fuckin' frayed wire shoved up his ass at one point, haha. Oh, yeah, that was fantastic. So it's settled, then! You think Deadpool 2 was a cinematic masterpiece and that Hollywood should just stop making movies altogether because none of them will ever top it! Great! Not exactly, Wade. Wait, what? I do have some gripes. Don't you fucking dare! For starters, while the movie is humorous, a good bit of that humor comes from reusing jokes from the first Deadpool movie. Wade's hand being tiny, Weasel adlibbing about Wade's appearance (even saying the word "avocado" again), "X Gon' Give it to Ya" being played again (albeit only for a moment). It's shit that honestly doesn't matter all things considered, but really comes across as, as Wade puts it himself, "lazy writing". The scene of Wade parodying Basic Instinct was funny, yes, but it was also, firstly, really fucking scary, and secondly, just a sillier rehash of a good joke in the first movie. Wade goes through yet another "fantasy love daydream" following a head injury, just like he did in the first one (except without cartoon animals in this one). Sure, it's funnier here cause it's about a man, but it's still the same joke. That scene goes on for two straight minutes, in the middle of a fight scene. Yes, it's funny, but it really could have been something more original. Unrelated to all the rehashing, I felt that Russel's character was very annoying. Well-acted, but annoying. That was kinda spoiler-y, Monty. Oh, you're gonna talk to me about spoilers? Didn't you give away this movie's ending not even five minute into it? Maybe. Look, all in all, Deadpool 2 is not as good as the first one. That being said, I still had a blast watching it! And, considering that it's been out for two months, I'm sure a lot of you all did as well. Deadpool 2 is funny, it's heartwarming, and, at times, it's pretty friggin' awesome. It's good fun, warts and all, and I enjoyed it! I'm gonna give Deadpool 2 a 7.5 out of- *BLAAAM!* Well, that was fun. Is anyone still on this barren wasteland of a website? No? Eh, who fuckin' cares? This has been Deadpool's Movie Reviews! I'm gonna give Deadpool 2 a 10/10! Go see it immediately or I will find you. Oh, and don't worry about Amont. He'll be fine. I'm gonna force him to see the Teen Titans Go! movie in about a week. That'll be funny. Don't tell him. Category:Blog posts